So, the next day—
Leaving Ouroboros to watch the house, Arisa, Sonya, Maria and I headed for the corner of the forest where the elves supposedly live.
For gifts, we packed carrots, garlic, cherry tomatoes, bean sprouts, and soybeans.
Elves apparently love tomatoes in particular — “One bite o’ those an’ the deal closes ITSELF!” per Arisa.
“A walk~♪ We’re on a walk~♪”
“Is it carrot-snack time yet~?”
“Captain, ma’am~! Boar sighted~! Do we hunt it~?”
Sonya beamed at the troops.
“Hunting is on holiday today~”
The palm-top rabbits were their usual selves: peacefully, harmoniously noisy.
And so we arrived at the elf settlement, except…
“That’s… quite something.”
It was ringed with bramble-laced wooden palisades… and I could also see anti-cavalry stakes, plus moats fitted with impale-on-arrival bamboo spears.
Less a “settlement” than some kind of uniquely elven forest fortress.
And the fortifications just kept GOING, on and on, as far as I could see.
“Well, elves ARE a warrior race, y’know.”
Oi oi. Nobody told me that part.
Then, from what looked like a watch-post near the entrance, a blonde elf woman emerged—
“E-e-ENEMY ATTACK! The palm-top rabbits are attacking in FORCE! Hide them! HIDE THEM! HIDE THE CARROTS! And ready the counterattack!”
And the presumed lookout sprinted away into the settlement.
Hm? What exactly is this situation?
“Ufufu~. We don’t even steal carrots anymore, they’re so dramatic~. Tatsuya’s carrots taste better anyway~♪”
“Riiight… Sonya, dear?”
“What is it~?”
“Did you all… in the past… DO things to the elves?”
“Elf carrots are delicious, you know? That’s why, for the coming-of-age rite, the little bunnies head to the elf settlement risking life and limb~”
“So… in concrete terms, that means…?”
“The elves call us the Tiny Forest Gangsters~?”
I froze for a good while, and then—
”…Huh?”
—was all that came out.
“But they really are SO dramatic about it, the elves~”
“No — if you were committing burglary, YOU’RE the villains here?”
Damn it…
We’d built such a friendly relationship that I’d badly underestimated the palm-top rabbits.
They run on fluffy, easygoing vibes, sure — but the epithet was “Gluttons of MASSACRE,” wasn’t it.
Where carrots are concerned, these creatures clearly recognize no rules of engagement.
“Also — this is getting legitimately dangerous.”
The settlement gate was sealed tight, and several hundred bow-armed elves were massing behind the palisade.
“Maria? What’s THAT?”
I pointed at the watchtower platform above the gate.
Dozens of robed elves were filing onto it, forming ranks, and leveling their staves at us in unison.
“Elf magi — ritual attack magic INCOMING!”
Uooohh!
I don’t know the technical terminology, but a ball of flame ten meters across — the kind of thing where “Fireball” would fit as a name, if fireballs came in raid-boss editions — came flying at us.
And the elves behind the palisade added a rain of arrows on top.
—Damn it! What’s the play here?!
For lack of better ideas, I raised my trusty hoe—
SWISH-SWISH-SWISH-SWISH!
The hoe began swatting arrows out of the air at ludicrous speed.
Until now I’ve handled monsters via “ka-boom,” but this time something was different.
A sensation like my body moving on its own… no, that’s not right.
I AM moving by my own will — but I simply KNOW how to move, and my body is absurdly light.
Sonya and Maria, being fundamentally busted, dodged the arrows on pure technique — or caught them out of the air. Zero hits taken.
The palm-top rabbits are tiny targets to begin with, plus blindingly fast and precise.
That high-level-monster-hunting résumé is clearly not for show.
Meanwhile… I let out a wry laugh.
“So you were strong too, huh?”
“Salvager work’s mostly runnin’ away, sure — but ya still need SOME fightin’ chops, or ya don’t get to prowl a forest like that one, y’know? This here’s still normal forest. One step into THAT place an’ the difficulty jumps to Extreme.”
Arisa’s dagger — which I’d assumed was for show — was clearly well-worn, weaving through arrows and cutting them down in one flowing motion.
“The real problem is THAT, though…”
Because the ritual fireball launched earlier was, of course, still inbound.